This post.. is going to be really deep and long. So be prepared.
I know my previous post was about a girl that I like, but the truth is, she's not the only one. I don't understand how someone can like two or more people at the same time. I don't understand at all, but it happens to me. It's frustrating and I feel guilty. This post is going to be about the other girl. Let's call her Cola. I should begin with how I met her, or can you even say 'met' in this situation...?
I started Mandarin classes with my friend Jam in September of this year. The place where he have these lessons is in a college called JCC. Our Chinese school borrow the college on the weekend, and so does the Arabic school. Most if the Chinese lessons are located on the second floor except Mandarin and AS class which are on the third. The Arab classes mostly take place on the third floor also.
About 20 minutes into the first lesson, two Arab sisters came in and sat on the table next to me and Jam. We eventually spoke to them, and they introduced themselves to us as Mo and Room. I thought Mo was pretty fit. During break, us four (me, Jam, Mo and Room) decided to chill together. We walked past several Arab rooms since we were on the third floor. Mo showed me the room she had her Arabic lessons in, and I spotted a pretty Arab girl. Now if you know me well, you know I have a strict rule for only going for Chinese girls, albeit having a few exceptions. Therefore if I found this girl pretty, she must be special. I learnt that her name was Cola. She and Mo were friends.
After class had finished, me and Jam went to get McDonalds and took it back to the college to eat it. After we finished, we met up with Mo and Room because their brother had Arab lessons until 3pm, and Mandarin class finishes at 1. With the two sisters were a couple of other Arab girls, but I didn't notice until later, because my eyes focused only on Cola. She was beside them. She saw us and said 'Which one of you is Tofu?'. I guessed that Mo had told her about me, because I had told everyone I thought Cola was really pretty. I was happy, that was the first and probably last time she'd spoken to me.
She added me on Facebook later that week. I thought it was weird that I couldn't find her on it. She had hidden her profile from search. I also found it that weird that I couldn't see her photos even though I'm her friend. I thought maybe she is just really careful about her privacy, so I respected that. As the weeks went by, the only times I could see her were the times I'd walk past her classroom when I walked to break. It lasted maybe one or two seconds, and every time I waved. I also learnt that her parents are super strict. Her dad doesn't allow her to talk to boys if possible. I can't interfere with family matters, so I can't do anything about it but, I think that that is extremely unfair.
Today (22/10) is her birthday. When I walked past her room this time, I ignored the Arabic teacher telling me to go away, looked through the window, and mouthed 'happy birthday Lola'. She got the message and gave me a smile. I realised then how incredibly beautiful she is. If angels existed, she'd be the most good looking of them all. I couldn't understand if what I felt then was infatuation, lust or love. Whatever the feeling was, I wanted to experience it again. I didn't see her again since then. Back at home, I started to question whether I liked her more, or the other girl. After thinking for a long time, I decided it was Cola. She's got to be the one I like more.
I contacted Mo on WhatsApp and asked whether I had a chance with Cola. She replied 'How serious are you?'. I was quite shocked because I don't think Mo and I have ever had a serious conversation. After a bit, she told me that it most likely wouldn't work out anyway, even if Cola liked me back. I was stunned. Why wouldn't it work out?
These are her exact words:
Tbh andy it can't really go anywhere even if she did like ou back..
And if her dad found out you'd probs never be able to talk again
So don't get too intimate over inbox
Cuz her dad checks her fb
+ she hasn't had her phone for months cuz her dad found 2 guys on her bbm
So..
Yeah
Just looking out for ya
So that's what she said to me over WhatsApp. I dunno why, but it actually made my palms slightly sweaty. I think I was just shocked at the fact that her parents are so strict, especially the dad. I didn't even know people still lived lives like this. It's just so unfair, taking that freedom away from your children. Cola's not gonna have the experience she needs when she's older, and plus I wanna date her haha. Anyway, that's about it so far. Spoke to her today on Facebook, and she's really sweet. She called me big head, which I acknowledge to, but said she finds it cute. That's the first ever compliment I got about my head. And to add to that, she said my hair was awesome, but she's just stating the obvious there.
Since I can't get her phone number, and we can never see each other, I guess I'll just stick to seeing her on the other side of the window, if that's as close to her as I can get.
Thanks for reading.
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